I WANT TO BE YOUR PRIME MINISTER

Gordon Brown’s leadership song.

There’s no reason to be skittish
about taking pride in being British.
The Empire may be over, but we’re great

We’ve faced up to global terror
so let me be your standard bearer.
I’ll even stop the trains from running late.

I want to be your Prime Minister,
not the saturnine and sinister
chancellor on the fringes of true power.

I want to take the reins at number 10
get Labour back on track again
and stop the world from thinking that I’m dour.

I may be prim and slightly lacking
the brutal edge needed when attacking
non-financial problems with some flair

but I’ve got conditional support
from spinning toadies who purport
to speak the true gospel of the Blair.

I want to be your Prime Minister
with a tonic to administer,
an enema to shift the status quo

I’m what Labour has been missing
in nine years of backside kissing,
when policy’s been secondary to show.

I’ll build a national community
based on understanding, opportunity
and punish those who go to the extreme.

I’m not moaning, I’m not cavilling
This is the right road to be travelling
even if I must play for the team

I want to be your Prime Minister,
not the saturnine and sinister
chancellor on the fringes of true power.

I want to lead you all to glory
and I’ll stick to the Blairite story
‘til I pull the bugger from his ivory tower.