Shaun Bailey’s cake

Shaun Bailey is in an interesting position. Standing for Mayor against an incumbent he is months out and 22 points behind in the polls with finances no doubt stretched to breaking point by the extended race. With no money or momentum – it’s now or never.

Under this pressure, we get a glimpse of the true character of Mr. Bailey. Does he begin to frame this as a heroic defeat? Does he declare war on his unpopular allies? Does he announce a long-held, controversial policy decision? Does he, like the great Rory Stewart, completely upend the preconception of a politician by walking the streets of London talking to the average voter?
No. He has gone bold, but he’s also gone batsh*t.

He has released a fever-dream parody of the Great British Bake Off where ‘you can really taste the reduction in crime’.

Comparing the production to a porn shoot would be paying it a great service. Wayne Lineker and Theresa May lookalikes grind out performances in a set that doesn’t even resemble a tent. Shaun speaks once inaudibly. Sadiq’s appallingly CGI’d face just looks confused or glum.

After all the years of worrying about all the potential uses of political deepfake videos and the repercussions of reality TV taking over statesmanship, I never envisaged something so nightmarish.