Another year, another bout of IACGMOH, addictive mind candy satisfying our latent lust for the guilty pleasures of a reality TV series. Please drop the faux intellectual bollocks that it’s corrosive, we all take a sadistic pleasure in watching it! Before I judge Lynne Franks’ first few days in the comfort of the Australian bush, I must declare an interest. I am proud to declare that I am a friend of Lynne Franks and have watched her trial with enthusiastic sympathy.
The production team called a few days before the first show was aired to ask me to film a noddy about Lynne. On camera I deliberated that Lynne’s decision to go in was inspired – very Lynne. It is patently obvious that she was conscious of her old pal Janet Street Porter’s success and I am convinced she wants to do better. Lynne has a very competitive streak. Every contestant bleats on that they indulge in the show to establish the real person and not the person that the media chooses to present. LF is so far removed from the Edina cliché cruelly immortalized by Jennifer Saunders in Absolutely Fabulous. She will surprise the masses because she is a bright, clever, ruthless, compassionate, spiritual and generous human. I pray the editors allow her to shine. I know she doesn’t take orders and likes to lead from the front but she is undoubtbly manipulating the show. She has entered for one reason – her current passion – The Seed network would mature with the oxygen of publicity. LF’s profile is likely to go through the roof if she triumphs. She will be thanking the universe for putting her in the camp with Janice Dickenson. Lynne looks so beautiful compared to the botoxed freak that has less expression in her face than the death mask of Tutankhamen. The battle of wills has made great TV and Lynne has knowingly manipulated it to keep the cameras on her. Lynne is a great PR and grasps the value of content that triggers media attention. Demonstrating tenacity and self belief, she assuredly deals with Dickenson’s tantrums and odd emotional failings as if she is a truculent overbearing client. The extent of her preparation for the show was underlined when The Apprentice woman, Katie Hopkins, walked into camp. In a few sound bites she encapsulated the incomer with a vivid SWOT analysis. Yes, Lynne has acquitted herself marvelously. I hope her genuine spirituality will make people vote for her, surely her chants will be answered by the cosmos. Expect to see more of Lynne on the box over the next few years.