Archive for August, 2006

Sir Mick Jagger forgot the words to classic Rolling Stones song ‘Ruby Tuesday’ during a concert last week. Mick covered up his memory loss by singing the same verse twice. He also has an oxygen tank backstage to help him get through his grueling live shows.

Hey you get offa my tank.
I need all that oxygen
it’s my memory bank
for when the words go away
and all I can do
is repeat the first verse
in place of verse number two.

Hey you get offa my tank.
Can’t hit high notes without it
and my mind goes as blank
as Keef’s face when he’s hunting
up coconut trees.
Without my oxygen hit
I go weak at the knees.

Hey you get offa my tank…
Err…I need all that oxygen
…it’s my memory bank
for when the… words go away
…and all I can do
is repeat the first verse
in place of verse number… three

Hey You Get Offa My Tank Play Now | Play in Popup | Download

As my mother once said, never expect to please everyone ..

Robin Hoodwinked?
By John Plunkett / Television 12:55pm

It’s the biggest mystery since ITV commissioned a second series of Love Island – what has happened to the master tapes for Robin Hood? And is Hungary’s answer to Police Five’s Shaw Taylor on the case?

Latest reports from Hungary – where the BBC1 series was being filmed – suggest the thief snuck past security guards and climbed up a fire escape.

PR stunt. I suspect Mark Borkowski is already writing his ‘Who says the old ones aren’t the best?’ article about how it reminds him of the good old days of classic PR tomfoolery etc etc etc etc zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Posted by beneboy on August 29, 2006 03:29 PM.

http://blogs.guardian.co.uk/organgrinder/2006/08/robin_hoodwinked_1.html#more

Hungary for publicity?

I might be wrong, but could the BBC’s Robin Hood tapes in Budapest be just the latest bid to steal column inches during the silly season?

http://media.guardian.co.uk/columnists/story/0,,1861304,00.html
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One of Jim Moran’s publicity stunts involved the actress Ann Blyth taking a bubble bath before the eyes of photographers in Los Angeles for the National Association of Inventors.

Blyth had just made a debut in the movie “Mr Peabody and the Mermaid” and had won an accolade for playing the mermaid. Moran thought she would be a natural choice for the bubble bath photocall. Blyth always made headlines: in 1954 at the Academy Awards, she famously sang “Secret Love”, a Doris Day song from Calamity Jane when she was 7 months pregnant.

In the 1960’s Blyth wasn’t lazy at getting involved with brands, when she became the “Hostess Cupcakes” spokesperson. It was Jim Moran who made Blyth and many others aware of the benefits of aligning themselves with a brand and making best use of photocalls.

In the past, a goad, or prick, used to be used to jab an ox used to till the soil. Sometimes the ox would refuse this incentive by kicking out at the prick. As result, the prick would be driven deeper into the flesh of the rebellious animal. In the case of Paramount versus Tom Cruise, it is difficult to decide whom the metaphor should be applied to…

So it’s farewell Tom Cruise from the Paramount lot.
He costs too much money; he’s no longer hot.
He hectors, he postures, he jumps on the couch.
When he doesn’t get his way he’s a tedious grouch
and even his teeth have learned how to preach.
Reality’s fallen far from his reach.

Hollywood politics teeter on the absurd –
the boundaries of power are thoroughly blurred
and money speaks softly with devilish glee
before launching it’s latest cost-cutting spree.
It’s damned hard to tell who works the field harder.
Is it star or mogul stocking the larder?

It’s also farewell to Paramount’s cred.
Who now will they woo to gold plate their bread
if they’re seen treating their stars, however crass,
as asses who need to be put out to grass?
It’s foolish to taunt the beast you’ve created,
especially one that’s recently mated.

Frankenstein really would not have been proud.
This jolt from the heavens he’d not have allowed,
for though Tom may be mad as a barrel of snakes
he’s still a big name and he’s got what it takes
to fling plenty of mud and make sure it sticks.
It’s all a case, you might say, of pricks kicking pricks.

Kicking Against the Pricks Play Now | Play in Popup | Download

The Hollywood studios were always extremely frustrated by poor reviews. Today, film production companies aren’t giving reviewers the opportunity to slate their multi million dollar offerings before release; instead they are encouraging comment from random everyday internet users. Snakes On A Plane is the most current example of how a film can get hyped to success by “blogging”, thus disabling all the film critics.

In the 1940’s there was a host of Hollywood studio million dollar movies that were totally slated by the East Coast film critics. As a result, big investment films went into decline. Russell Birdwell was responsible for coming up with a plan to put a stop to the endless poor reviews. He decided to employ gigolos in the studio exploitation departments whose job it was to go to the East Coast as representatives of the studios. They would then wine and dine the female film critics and columnists, befriend them… and maybe more. This near-prostitution was exposed by a newspaper when one well known female journalist contracted syphilis. The senior editor of the magazine the journalist worked for, approached Birdwell with the apocryphal “that is a manipulation too far!”
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EXCLUSIVE Have the Big Brother couple found true love or is it a …
Mirror.co.uk – London,UK
… As celebrity agent Mark Borkowski puts it: “Their celebrity was beginning to wane. By getting married so soon they’re trying to re-establish themselves.”. …

http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/tm_objectid=17624139&method=full&siteid=94762&headline=fairy-telle-wedding–name_page.html
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Jim Moran was the publicist responsible for selling fridges to Eskimos when he famously teamed up “Refridgerator” with American Airlines. American Airlines virgin flight to Alaska needed publicity as well as “Refridgerator’s” first Ice Box.

Moran organised the transport of the ice box on the first flight to Alaska, which brought about the publicity stunt to sell fridges to Eskimos. The first sale of a fridge in the U. S. was actually a milestone in the history of modern household management. At first, the appliance was no more than an exotic luxury item, so Moran sought to bring it to a much wider market. He had more ideas for European promotional activity which involved using enterologists to squeeze themselves into “Refridgerator” fridges in every major European town.

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Britney Spears – who is currently pregnant with her second child – is reportedly so devoted to her pet pooch Lucky, she wants to follow the example of the ancient Egyptians and be buried with her. She said: “You know how the Pharaohs used to get buried with things they loved? I want to do that with Lucky. She should be laid to rest with me when the time comes.”

“I want you to bury me with my hound.
She’s my perfect friend, I need her around.
I need her beside me when I’m in the ground,”
says Britney.

“A dog is for life and for death as well.
Her bark would cheer me in heaven or hell.
Whatever my secrets, she’ll never tell,”
says Britney.

“The life of a pop star is no fun without friends
and dogs don’t care about sales or trends.
I want Lucky beside me when my life ends,”
says Britney.

Blonde Ambition part 4 Play Now | Play in Popup | Download

Madonna believes she can help save the world from an ecological meltdown by using a special Kabbalah water to dispose of nuclear waste. Madonna has previously been quoted as saying: “According to science, we aren’t going to have a planet in about 50 years at the rate we’re going with nuclear waste. I can write the greatest songs, make the most fabulous films and be a fashion icon and conquer the world but if there isn’t a world to conquer, what’s the point?”

She’ll heal the world and make nuclear waste
into a tasty nutritious strawberry paste
with Kabbalah water from a Russian lake
and then for an encore she’ll give the starving cake
She’ll end all wars with a wave of her bra
and magically transform every single car
so that they run on Guinness and Diet Coke
She’ll make asthmatics unable to choke
She’ll clothe the starving and feed the unclad
and make all the lunatics slightly less mad
because she’s Madonna, the messiah of pop
and she’s far too rich now to know when to stop.

Blonde Ambition part 3 Play Now | Play in Popup | Download